Here is a very important lesson in Self-Leadership.
Many years ago, when the first big firm I worked for had been sold, and at the new firm, I’d made a couple of dramatic big sales, the new supervisor asked me to work more with the original members of his firm, even though neither our work nor our clients overlapped. I see now I had no idea what he was asking.
I Never Asked
I know I never asked him because I was sure at the time I knew what he meant. I was sure he was asking me to do the very thing I didn’t want to do: work on his other employees’ projects in order to increase my billed hours. I didn’t like that. I was a big-picture business developer and risk-taker, both of which strengths had resulted in big sales for the new firm. I wanted to have free rein to do more of that and not be pressured over my billed hours. After all, my job was to create work and billable hours for other people, and I was good at it. “Doesn’t he know that??” I said to myself.
I Thought I Already Knew
Who knows what he knew? Who knows what he was asking? I certainly didn’t because I didn’t ask him. Who knows what I might have learned if I’d asked him for his wants and needs and then leaned in? But I’ll never know because I was sure I already knew. To answer your question, no, I didn’t comply with his request, which added to our never really getting along, though at the time I didn’t believe I had any role in that. Sam, if you’re reading this, I was wrong. I should have asked you want you meant and what you wanted.
Reader, have you ever made that mistake of thinking you already knew? Please “comment”.
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Hi Dave, the subscription pop-up should have “caught” you as you were leaving the page. You can subscribe there. if you didn’t see it, please click “contact me” and I’ll take care of the problem. thanks for stopping by.
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Asking questions are actually nice thing if you are not understanding anything
fully, however this post offers nice understanding even.
I’m glad you agree. We get so busy these days putting our point across, we sometimes forget to pause long enough to just ask what in the heck the person meant! Thank you for commenting.
Thanks for seeing it that way. Seems like hardly anyone asks enough questions these days. I’ve learned my lesson about that.
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Thanks, Cary! It’s nice to see you here. Please visit and comment again soon!
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Welcome Annette! Yes, my posts go directly to Twitter and you can find me there at @coachevabowman Thanks for asking! see you back here?
Thank you again. Which topic do you particularly like? Let’s chat. And please subscribe with the form at the left.
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Thank you for the request – it’s nice to have readers like you. What exactly would you like to read more about? Getting out of your own way? Please do let me know. For now, click in these categories at the right: Self-Leadership, Resilience, Leadership. You’ll find similar topics there. Thank you again, and please consider subscribing by email using the form on the right side of the first page.
This is a topic that’s close to my heart… Take care!
Exactly where are your contact details though?
Hi, and thank you for coming by. The contact form is right there at the upper right, under “About”. Should I make it more prominent? Just let me know. I will add to the homepage to “Follow me on Twitter at @coachevabowman”. Thanks for the reminder. Please consider subscribing to the blog using the form on the homepage.
Welcome to Plastic Optical Fiber, I’m glad you’re here. Please DO check back frequently! Make it a little easier by subscribing on the email subscription form on the first page. See you back here?
Unambiguous concerning unexpected emotions.
You’re so right about ‘unexpected emotions’. They’re the ones that get us, aren’t they? Please visit me again soon; I look forward to chatting with you. Please sign up for your email subscription on the front page.
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